Diwan

Man Outnumbered 2.0: Chocolate For All

It’s been a while, I know, but I’m back and have lots to share. First and foremost, I’m sitting right next to The Mistress for the second day in a row and it’s been nice catching up and sharing all the tales of my trip in London with the expensive bananas (how can you sell a single banana for £1?!) Other than that, my vacation went well but now it’s back to business. I have 4 more days to spend in paradise until I go straight back to hell. I really don’t miss that place at all and I don’t miss the constant harassments with phone calls and emails. I’ll keep the complaining for another post, this one’s especially for the new faces at the office.

Good afternoon chicos and chicas and happy Ramadan to all who are fasting. So I went back to the office and saw that the male intern was nowhere to be seen. HAHA. I guess I was more than an intimidation towards him. I mean to replace Man Outnumbered himself takes years and years of searching for the correct human being with the perfect combination of looks, a sense of humor, and a loving personality. They did try that with the recent dropout but clearly failed. Girls actually work more efficiently than guys (I’m an exception) and so why waste your time in trying to add a spice of testosterone to the office?

When I stepped in the office, I saw a classic, old face that was part of that classic group of interns back in the day. She goes by the name of Happy. It was nice finally having someone to make fun of and annoy again and feel totally ok with it. New faces included Giggles and Yam-Yam and you’re may wondering how I came up with those nicknames? CLUE: It has nothing to do with the famous chocolate snack we used to have during school.

And now I will share my exact feelings on the male intern who left after making a few appearances (reminded me of Carly Rae Jepsen’s career):

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL!

That felt good. Ok, back to the being around The Mistress and if what I just did felt good, being around her felt like a million bucks!

There she was, sitting at her desk in an all-white outfit working to get the next issue done. It was great being around her after my long vacation. Surprisingly, the encounter went well except for the fact that I couldn’t get any work done because she was right there in front of me. You can argue over the fact that she was there first and I chose to sit next to her.

So on Sunday I go back to the place filled with the annoying co-workers who see fit to constantly call me and send about 80 emails in total talking about a task that I have no idea about (not because I’m not a hard-working employee or anything like that) I have to look for an escape route which usually means my boss having one of her quiet days which means no more than 30 emails sent to moi (yes, that’s quiet) or if there’s a meeting outside the office which means 20 minutes for the meeting and about 2 hours with The Mistress. Wish me luck!

Adnan Al-Timimi a.k.a Man Outnumbered is in a dilemma. Having a mistress can be risky but visiting her is an absolute delight. Follow his column to know more about his adventures with The Mistress.

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